Skip to main content


Greetings !!!

Hello Everyone Welcome to "Living the Life"
A blog created to answers questions, share information, share stories, tips, and suggestions. As someone who is involved with the BDSM lifestyle, I found it very tedious to look the same things up on five different sites to get answers. I also found it frustrating when information was inaccurate or misinterpreted. People with our preferences are not violent, emotionally scared, or broken. We are the ones who want to put trust in another human being with our wellness taking us beyond our limits. I love this beautiful and non-judgmental environment. This is where I want to live and just visit society every now and then.

I am not going to isolate this site just for the fellow BDSM lovers. This is a blog I have created for everyone who is interested. It is open to those who are curious about what all it entails or just simply want to look for some kinky ideas to translate to the bedroom. I am hoping that this will be a fun interactive …
Recent posts

#4: Early Kink

Day # 4 of "30 Days of Kink"
Did you have any early experiences that, in retrospect, hinted at your kink?
I've had plenty of indicators that I was going to be into this lifestyle growing up. My obsession with Werewolves and Vampires as a child was the first massive sign. In both pieces of mythology there was the intense need of bitting someone on the neck. If it wasn't to make someone a proper mate, then it was to stay alive. It was a very intense feeling associated with it and I was always curious of how it would feel to be in that position.

My preference for this particular type of attention was what started my need for having a Dom. No random guy would be able to take over the way the Alpha could. I love men that illuminate their control and dominance without having to say a word. Most girls would scream and cry over the boy band type of guy while I fond over the rugged gentlemen. I even prefer a guy more on the husky side because of the appearance that they could …

#3: Kinky Discovery

Day # 3 of "30 Days of Kink"
How did you discover you were kinky?

I discovered I was into kink when I was pretty young, which is weird when I think about it. I grew up a fan of things that were considered unconventional at the time. I am a black female who grew up in a very simple house hold that revolved around R&B, Hip-Hop, and Gospel music. Everyone wanted to look like certain music artists, where Jordans, and follow suit with everything on television. Seeing the same things on a daily basis made me gravitate toward anything new.

I started listening to Rock music and watching movies that revolves around Horror, Vampires, Werewolves, Succubi, and any other sort of supernatural thing I could find. My favorite movie during this time was "The Queen of the Damned". That aspect of my life already revolved around black, leather, messy hair, and indulging in what isn't considered appropriate to the rest of the world. It isn't too big of a leap from that into …

#2: Kink of Choice

Day # 2 of "30 Days of Kink"
If you could only indulge one kink, what would it be and why?

The one kink that I would indulge without hesitation is biting. I have always loved the way it feels to have the sharp edge of someones teeth on my skin. It is a simple enough kink where it won't be looked at as anything really odd in a vanilla relationship, but it is good enough to get my rocks off without having to be tied down.

It plays into the role of me being Alpha Submissive. Even when I was younger, when it came to wolves particularly, I associated a bite on the neck with being mated and bound to the alpha. The biting doesn't have to just stop at the neck either. I've always been interested in it and it developed from there into something that would be inappropriate to discuss casually to the world.

Naughty Anime

Nice Doggy
Since I have joined the lifestyle things have been popping up and jokes that would normally go over my head are so much more apparent. So with that being said, this anime has screamed BDSM to me since my potential Dom decided to show it to me. It is called "Wolf Girl and Black Prince", which is clearly about a Dom finding himself a new pet. You can see just how twisted this anime is from the lyrics for the opening song below. There is even a collar in the title with her saying she'd follow his orders. I'm telling you a freak (in a good way) was responsible for making this anime. I found it very enjoyable to watch even though nothing inappropriate actually happened. Everything that was said that can be taken multiple ways had me laughing the whole way through. 

The most interesting part is that the anime is based on a movie by the same name

Please tell me that there are more animes like this List them below ⇟

#1: Perception

Day # 1 of "30 Days of Kink"
How do you label yourself, and why? What interests you about BDSM/kink? What does BDSM mean to you, personally?

The label that I personally identify with is a Alpha Submissive. For me, that means that I don't bow to just any man. I am still the boss and I call the shots until the Alpha comes to play. I will allow him to call the shots if he has earned the title. I can sense a lack of authority in a male figure and their ability to control a situation. The guys who lack the control are the ones who don't last too long trying to get involved with me.  
My interests in BDSM revolve around the vulnerability and trust that is given to the partner. You have to be a very open person to let someone take all of your control. The passion that goes into this life makes me more confident in my ability to have a open, honest, and fun relationship without being afraid of expressing myself because my partner will have seen me at my most raw moments. 

Music + Freaks

Music Videos

A list of the most BDSM music videos you can find
Madonna "Human Nature" ⇟

Christina Aguilera "Not Myself Tonight" ⇟

Rihanna "S&M" ⇟

Thirty Seconds to Mars "Hurricane" ⇟

Madonna "Erotica" ⇟

Marilyn Manson "(s)AINT" ⇟

Son Lux "Easy" ⇟

List Videos below ⇟

"Submissive Questions"

Referenced: A kinkster's Guide
#1: Are you a natural submissive or a learned submissive or both? What parts of you are each? ⇝Answer⇜

#2: What does submission mean to you? Surrender? How is this different from passivity? Are the two connected? ⇝Answer⇜

#3: Would you rather surrender or be conquered? Why? ⇝Answer⇜

#4: When you were younger, what kinds of fantasies did you have? Did you understand what they meant? How did you feel about them? Did you share them with anyone? Try to act any out? What happened? ⇝Answer⇜

#5: How do you feel about punishment in BDSM relationship? Is it necessary for all Masters and slaves? Does it turn the slave into a child or make her a more responsible adult? ⇝Answer⇜

#6: What parts of you are submissive? Which parts of you are dominant or a switch? How do you balance out these different parts of yourself? ⇝Answer⇜

#7: What actions you Dom does have you noticed make you feel immediately submissive or small? What actions just annoy or irritate you? Make you h…